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The Ring Is THE Thing
They met three years ago when he was shopping for a pair of diamond earrings for himself in the jewelry shop where she worked. Even then, the two could agree that the square "princess cut" was the way to go. The only point of contention was what color gold would surround the gem. Andrade, who is 19 and lives in Lodi, voted for yellow. Latorre had his heart set on white. In the end, he went with his gut. "This time around," he says, glancing down at the tray of rings, "I'm gonna empathize a little more." Latorre, who is 30 and lives in Paterson, is one large step ahead of the curve. He knows that his beloved has, as he says, "more contemporary taste" in jewelry than he does. For some men, such knowledge is itself a gem. For many soon-to-be-betrothed men, the ring-thing means just a confounding set of questions: Where do I start? How do I know what she wants? Who do I ask for help? And the age-old does size matter? "Just like (women) dream about their wedding day, they dream about that diamond engagement ring," says Tracy Silvia, spokeswoman for the Diamond Information Center, a New York-based public relations firm representing the diamond trading industry. That dream is held across cultures and income brackets, she added. Given all that, the task of searching out the perfect ring can seem as tall as a multi-tiered wedding cake. Grooms-to-be can comfort themselves knowing that there are entire Web sites devoted to educating the diamond consumer. "It's one of those traditions that virtually all women want to be a part of," says Silvia. "It's something she'll be wearing every day for rest of her life, so of course you want to find something that fits her style, that she's comfortable with, that she's going to enjoy wearing every day." The overwhelming majority of Americans have tied the knot (57 percent of those 15 and older are married, and almost half of all singles have been married). Not all women are rock-obsessed, of course, but in 2003, some 83 percent of all U.S. brides slipped their finger into a diamond engagement ring, according to the Diamond Information Center. These days, though, diamonds are more than a girl's best friend, says Sharon Naylor, who doles out advice on njwedding.com and has written 25 books, including "The Groom's Guide." "It means more to the man lately; there's a very fun and interesting phenomenon going on with guys now, called ring envy," Naylor says. "Guys are competing with each other to get the nicest ring. That doesn't mean the biggest ring, but they're taking a competitive stance." These eager pleasers would do well to follow the counsel of experts when it comes to style: Get advice from friends and mothers. Observe your girlfriend's taste in jewelry: Does she prefer gold or silver? Is it modern or traditional? Flashy or understated? What does she say about her friends' engagement rings? Whether plagued by "ring envy" or not, says Naylor, many diamond-seeking men are privy to a forceful guiding hand, so to speak. Forty-eight percent of couples - like Andrade and Latorre - shop together for the engagement ring, according to the Diamond Information Center. That's not surprising, says Aydin Akdemir, co-owner of d'Malke Jewelers at the Wayne Diamond & Jewelry Center. Often, a woman will browse and try on rings, either with her boyfriend or alone. A few days later, Akdemir says, the groom-to-be might return to request a specific ring. Couples may consult one another throughout the shopping process, the jeweler says, but usually, the man makes the purchase alone. That's how it worked for Bill Rudolph and Tennille Coba. By the time they started searching for a ring over the summer, 10 years had passed since the two met at an Alpha Phi Alpha fraternity party at Virginia State University. When the subject of The Ring surfaced, Rudolph, 34, was still reeling from having made the decision that Coba was the only one in the world for him. By then, the subject of shopping for a diamond "really wasn't a big thing for me," he says. Looking back on it now, the 28-year-old Coba laughs. "He didn't realize how big of a thing it was." From the get-go, Coba thought: "I can't have a piece of garbage on my hand." "It was totally superficial. But I needed to grow," says Coba, who is a payroll supervisor at TD Waterhouse and lives in Paterson. She learned that her original requisite - "a Sarah Jessica Parker kind of thing that had to be fabulous; two carats or more" - needed some tweaking. Through research, she learned about "the 4 C's" - cut, carat, clarity and color, the qualities that determine a diamond's value. In other words, Coba found, a 1-carat colorless and extremely clear gem could be as valuable as a 2-carat gem that's cloudy with a slightly yellow tint. For Rudolph, a supervisor at the Bryant Park Hotel in New York City, the main piece of knowledge he picked up came from a friend who told him: "Get her what she wants." Beyond that, the groom-to-be knew to ask for references of reputable jewelers. And he knew to set a price range - $3,000 to $5,000. Coba wanted to be with her boyfriend on the shopping trip since, as she puts it, "Bill doesn't care what a fork looks like, he just wants to eat off of it." Plus, the bride-to-be admits, she isn't the type to pretend she likes something when she doesn't. The two browsed and narrowed down the choices to about five rings. The rest was up to him. As summer turned to fall, Rudolph worked up the courage to ask Coba's father for his blessing. As fall turned to winter, Coba got anxious: "I couldn't go around saying I was engaged without a ring! I needed it." Then, last December, there it was. Sort of. By the time Rudolph said, "Every time I look at you, it's a dream come true," and got down on one knee to make it official, Coba could barely see the ring through her tears. It wasn't until a few hours later, mid-helicopter-ride - yes, Rudolph arranged a limousine and helicopter tour of New York City to celebrate the proposal - that Coba looked down at her ring finger and saw the glowing princess-cut diamond standing tall on a diamond-studded band. "Wow," was all she could say. KNOW YOUR ROCKS Everything you ever wanted to know about diamonds ... and more: www.adiamondisforever.com Everything you ever wanted to know about getting married ... and more: www.njwedding.com Everything you ever wanted to know about styles, price ranges and building your own engagement ring: www.bluenile.com Reach Jessica Adler at (973) 569-7169 or adler@northjersey.com. Photo Credit Above: ELIZABETH LARA / HERALD NEWS Copyright © 2005 North Jersey Media Group Inc. |
Eddie
Latorre and Juliana Andrade hunch over a velvet-lined tray of
glittering diamond engagement rings. It's funny, Latorre thinks.
Diamonds really brought them together.
